Tag Archives: bullying

Back Safety, General Safety Issues

WATCH OUT FOR OUR SCHOOL CHILDREN!

How quickly the summer school break goes by.  It seems the schools just ended another year, and now it’s almost time to begin a new one.  There is much anticipation in the air, especially for students that will experience school for the first time, or moving up to middle school, or high school.  This is our reminder to you that our future generations are going to be either walking, on a bus, in a carpool, or riding their bikes to school.  It is our responsibility as drivers to slow down and pay close attention.

Our second reminder: be sure your kids have received all their shots that are required to go to school.  Free clinics are offering these shots, so now’s the time to take care of it.  This is as important, or more so, than all the school supplies they will be needing. 

Many states have laws that forbid drivers using cell phones in a school zone.  This is a good law, and one that persons shouldn’t mind abiding by.  Save that conversation for later, after you have stopped your car and gotten out of it.  We need to remind our teens that texting and driving don’t mix at any time, and more so when there are chances of little ones crossing the streets or getting off the school bus. 

Schools must put a stop to school bus bullying or physical encounters on buses.  Schools should have constant communication systems between the bus drivers and the main office.  In case of an incident, school officials or law enforcement should step in immediately.  We have seen incidents that have been recorded on cell phones.  The person doing the recording should be calling for help, as well.  They may be afraid of a confrontation with the bully or bullies, but school administration officials should have a zero tolerance for this type of behavior. 

Parents, go with your little ones for the first few times if they will be riding a bus.  Be sure they understand when to get off safely and never to walk in front or directly behind the bus; rather, let the bus pull away first.  If they are walking, please accompany them for a while, and if you can, find an older child that you know and trust to walk with them.  Be sure they understand to obey the school crossing guard, who is there for their safety, and only cross streets at the corner. 

Another tip for parents: don’t overload your child’s backpack.  Their little backs can only carry so much, so balance the books, pens, crayons, etc. to lighten their load as much as possible. 

For those drivers who go to work each day, leave the house a little early, to allow time to stop for school children or a school bus.  It’s better to get to work on time, if possible, so take those extra minutes to head out and pay attention to little pedestrians. 

Many of us grew up or raised our children in much more innocent times.  Our children are most precious; if you live in a neighborhood that is not completely safe, please don’t send your child out alone.  Be sure they go to school in a group.  All kids should be taught never to talk to strangers or get in a vehicle with someone they don’t know.   

These tips are reminders for all of us – drivers, parents, teenagers, teachers, bus drivers, and school administrators –  to do our best to make this a very safe year for our children.  We should commit to seeing that they are kept safe and secure at all times.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

General Safety Issues

WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE LETTING YOUR CHILD RIDE THE SCHOOL BUS ALONE (GUEST POST)

 The first day of school is a momentous occasion for both parents and their children, but so is the first time that your child rides the school bus alone. For some parents, necessity forces them to put their kids on the bus, as their own professional schedules won’t allow for drop-offs and pick-ups. In other cases, belief that riding the bus builds character or exposes kids to manageable difficulty to give them strength is the motivating factor behind using the school bus as primary transportation. Whatever your reasons, there are a few things you should know before your little one climbs those steps for the first time.

Basic School Bus Safety

In order to teach your child the basic rules of school bus safety, you’ll need to know them yourself. Your child should never run to or from the bus, even if he’s late. He should always stand back from the curb and wait for the bus driver’s signal before crossing the street, and should be at least ten feet in front of the bus for peak driver visibility. While he’s on the bus, your child should never shout, get out of his seat or roughhouse with other kids. If you’re not there to put him on the bus and escort him back at the end of the day, your child will need to know these things in order to handle himself safely.

Expected Times of Arrival

Even if you’re not going to be there to greet the bus at the end of the day or put your little one on it, you should still know the expected time of arrival each way. Arranging a system of notification, especially at the end of the day, will let you know that your older child has reached his stop safely. If you don’t know what time the bus arrives at the stop, you won’t know what time to expect that message.

Adults on the Bus

Some school districts or individual buses have an adult aide, in addition to the bus driver, who works as a monitor, while others rely solely on the attention of the driver. If your child’s bus will not have a monitor, you’ll need to understand that he may be exposed to bullying or other behavior that goes unpunished, as the driver’s attention is focused on the road, rather than the conduct of her young riders.

Rules of Conduct

While there are some basic rules of common sense conduct that hold true on every bus, there may be more specific ones on a particular bus or within your school district that you’re not aware of. You can’t pass those rules along and explain them to your child if you don’t know what they are, so make a point of procuring a copy of the conduct rules from your child’s teacher or school administrators before his first solo ride.

How Behavioral Problems are Handled

Kids on the school bus may not be monitored as heavily as they are in class, which can lead to behavioral problems you’d never consider under other circumstances. Whether your child is the victim or the perpetrator of these infractions, they’re so likely to happen that you’ll need to have a basic grasp of how your school district and bus driver will handle potential behavioral problems.

Age Span of Student Riders

In some districts, it’s feasible to keep younger children separated from the older, more rambunctious bus riders. Smaller areas may not have enough students to warrant more than one bus on a single route, however, and may lump kids of all ages together. This can make for some particularly scary moments for very young children, who can be the target of older bullies. Find out what the average age span is of the riders on your child’s bus, so that you can be prepared for any problems or can make alternate arrangements if you feel uncomfortable with the idea of him being surrounded by junior high students.

Your Child’s Ability to Handle Riding the Bus Alone

Some kids are more mature than others of their age, while some fall a bit behind on the scale of emotional maturity. Before you put your child on the school bus to essentially fend for himself, you need to know where he falls on that scale and how capable he is of handling the potential stressors of riding a school bus. In the end, you’re the only person who will know exactly how prepared your child is, and how well he’s likely to deal with the situation.

Our thanks to Hannah Anderson, of fulltimenanny.com, for this valuable information.

General Safety Issues, Uncategorized

SEVEN COMMON FORMS OF CHILDHOOD BULLYING (GUEST POST)

As the importance of preventing bullying and teaching kids to deal with torment from their peers is emphasized more and more in the media, it becomes apparent that today’s bullying bears little resemblance to the taunting and teasing that most parents were subjected to during their own childhood years. The modern bully wears many faces, and has an unprecedented level of access to the lives of those they hurt. Here are seven forms of bullying that today’s children are exposed to on a regular basis.

  1. Cyber-Bullying – Bullies are able to take their insults, threats and hurtful words to a very public and thoroughly humiliating new level through social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter. Status updates make it easy for an entire social group to view and even comment on cruelty, while more personal threats can be sent through private messaging. Blogging platforms can also be used to mount full-scale smear campaigns, making it almost impossible for victims to face their peers.
  2. “Frenemies” – While the word “frenemy,” a portmanteau of the words “friend” and “enemy,” can be traced back to a 1953 Nevada State Journal article, the concept is intimately familiar to modern tweens and teens. Girls in particular have started to accept backhanded compliments and blatant rivalry as traits of their associates. When more assertive girls use the force of their personality and the threat of revoked social standing to coerce other members of their peer group into doing or saying things against their will, it is absolutely a form of bullying and should be treated as such.
  3. Bullying By Authority Figures – Typically, bullying is considered to fall in the realm of children and their peer group. As a result, taunts, insults and derogatory comments made by mean-spirited teachers or overzealous athletic coaches typically go unchallenged. Taught to obey authority figures, meek and mild-mannered children may never report this behavior for fear of retribution or punishment.
  4. Physical Harassment – There’s nothing new about physical bullying; stronger kids have been known to lord their prowess over smaller peers since the beginning of time. Tougher punishments and penalties have simply forced these bullies to get more creative when doling out their abuse, rather than curtailing it.
  5. Exclusion and Ostracism – Teachers and counselors with good intentions can make every effort to stamp out physical and verbal harassment, but their hands are tied when it comes to exclusion. Children and adolescents simply can’t be forced to associate with someone they’ve deemed an outcast, and this ostracism can be more painful for the victims than physical punches and kicks.
  6. Verbal Harassment – Name-calling, teasing and making fun of a child’s appearance, wardrobe or any other area of perceived inferiority might have crept over into social media and text message wars, but that hasn’t diminished its face-to-face value. Though the old adage about sticks and stones makes for a catchy rhyme, it does little to comfort youngsters that are mercilessly taunted for one “failing” or another.
  7. Blackmail – When every tween and teen carries a phone that doubles as a camera, snapping photos that double as blackmail material is the work of a moment. The release, or even the mere threat of release, of an embarrassing picture can send kids into a panic; kids who willfully inflict this torment on a peer are a new breed of bully.

Shame and fear of revenge can keep children from telling even a trusted adult about what they’re suffering through, leaving them feeling overwhelmed at the prospect of shouldering the burden alone. Because children are so often reluctant to discuss bullying, parents and caregivers should be on the lookout for signs of depression, isolation and agitation, which can be indicators of emotional turmoil and distress.

Sent to us by Roxanne Porter, of NannyJobs.org

There is nothing more hurtful than knowing that your child is the victim of bullies, regardless of how it is done.  Parents of bullies should start at home, letting their youngsters know that this is not allowed.  Teachers should do something about it when they witness this kind of behavior at school.  Young bullies can become mean adults who make life miserable for everyone they encounter.  If they are the cowardly type that hides behind a computer, their true character comes out.  We live in a time when the results of bullying can cause terrible things to happen to the victims.  Let’s please all find ways to get it under control – in your town, community, school, and at home.  If you see it happening, step up and say something.  Students are finding that if they all stick together, the bully will back down.  Support someone who needs your help.  Pat

General Safety Issues

HOW TO HELP A CHILD WHO IS BEING BULLIED (GUEST POST)

By Marcia Hall of GoNannies.com

Though bullying is certainly not a new problem that children face, in recent years it has escalated to a level that children have never before experienced. Parents whose children are being bullied often do not know how to help, however, there are many things that can be done to support, comfort and assist the child through this troubling time.

Stay connected with the child’s friends by allowing and encouraging him to have friends over. When parents encourage their child’s friends to spend time at the house where parents can witness the type of interactions that occur, parents are able to better appreciate the world their child lives in. This will also help encourage the child to open up and share more experiences and feelings with his parents.

Give your children a break from the pressures of their social media life.  One of the reasons bullying today is so alarming is that a good majority of it does not happen in person, but instead occurs virtually through social media sites. Because of this, a good way to help protect your child from the sorrow of cyber bullying is to create a “turn off time” in the house.  This is the time that all phones, computers, tablets and desktops get turned off for the night.  With this rule in place, your child at least has a time when he is not allowed to see or hear any hurtful comments.  It may not make the comments go away, but being forced to turn everything off for a while will make difference and give him some respite from the attacks if he is a victim of cyber bullying.

Fully listen to the child’s side of the story. Sometimes parents hear part of the story and assume they know the rest. It is very important to a child’s emotional stability to be fully heard by at least one person.  When a child can trust that his parents will listen to him fully no matter what, it gives him the strength to be honest about the issues he’s facing.

When a child shares an incident of bullying, respond with loving concern rather than trying to immediately fix the problem. Often, when parents first hear about a bullying incident, their initial reaction is to quickly find a solution.  This can frustrate a child who simply wanted someone to know what he is going though.  Avoid instantly coming back to him with simple “solutions” or even cliché’s that will do nothing to help the situation.

Ask the child how he wants to be helped before jumping in to fix the problem.  Many times children really just want a shoulder to cry on and are not looking for parents to help them fix anything.  Parents should have a discussion with their child before they come up with any solutions to the problem.

Validate the child’s emotions.  No matter what, the child is looking for someone to tell him it is ok to be worried, angry and even scared about being bullied.  Parents can validate these emotions by sharing stories from their own childhood and making sure the child knows that he has done nothing wrong.  Above all else, a child should walk away from his parents knowing that what he said is confidential and safe with them.

Rather than making blanket statements, ask the child questions to help him look at the issue from a different perspective.  Questions are the best way to help a child discover his own feelings about the situation at hand.  Choose questions that will help him think not just about how he feels about what happened, but also why he might feel that way. “Tell me more about that.”  “Why do you think that hurt you so much?” “How did everyone around you respond?” “What can you do to change the situation?” “What do you want to do about it?” These are a few questions that can help lead the child to discover how he really feels and what he wants to do about the situation.

Avoid being too directly involved in any issues your children has with their peers. Most parents want to not only help the child fix the problem, but also to fix the problem themselves.  While there is most definitely a time to talk to teachers and principals and to advocate for the child in other ways, the best and most effective thing a parent can do to help a child who is being bullied is to lead the child to his own conclusions about how to address the situation and then support and encourage him when he follows through on those actions.  Becoming directly involved can not only be embarrassing for a child, it also make the situation much worse.  In addition, it does not teach the child how to respond to these types of situations in life.

No parent wants their child to be bullied, but finding the right balance of love, observation and action can help a child not only get through the difficult events that are inevitable in childhood these days, but actually become a stronger and more resilient adult because of them.

General Safety Issues

TEN TIPS FOR PARENTS OF KIDS WHO ARE BEING BULLIED (GUEST POST)

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 This article is being shared by www.aupaircare.net, sent to us by Sophie Leake.  We have talked about bullying before; it is such an important issue that any help for parents should be passed on.  When you child hurts, you hurt!  Pay attention to this serious concern for the health and welfare of your child.  There’s no place in the world for bullying. pb
 
 
 

There are few things as heartbreaking and infuriating as learning that your child is the victim of bullying. As attention towards this very real problem allows more parents to understand that the way some children are treated is more serious than a simple case of “kids being kids,” efforts to crack down on schoolyard harassment are increased. If your child is among the millions that are physically or emotionally tormented by a bullying peer, these 10 tips can help you navigate this delicate situation.

  1. Recognize the Signs – Kids are often reluctant to approach an adult or to report bullying behavior because of a sense of shame or embarrassment. It’s important to keep your eyes open for any signs of bullying so that you’re able to recognize them and begin to help your child solve the problem.
  2. Be Available – While pushing or pressuring your child to open up about any trouble he’s having at school is likely to make him even more reluctant to talk, it’s imperative that your child know you’re there and available to listen to him whenever he does need to talk to you. When he’s not being pressed to talk about being bullied, he may be more willing to open up.
  3. Ask Questions – Make sure that you take the time to learn what sort of abuse your child is suffering from, why it’s happening and what you can do to support him through it.
  4. Discourage Retaliation – It’s imperative that you not only abstain from encouraging your child to retaliate against bullying peers, but also that you take an obvious stand against it. Retaliation will only cause your child to land himself in trouble, and can often backfire in terrible ways.
  5. Save Harassing Communications – Make sure that any emails, private messages on social networking sites, texts or voice messages that contain harassing statements, threats or other proof of bullying are saved for reporting purposes.
  6. Speak With School Administrators – In persistent cases of bullying, the best course of action is to calmly approach school administrators to discuss the matter. Though it can be understandably difficult for you to keep your emotions under wraps during these conversations, it’s important to remember that you’re more likely to get the results you’re looking for if you maintain your composure and remain calm.
  7. Teach Him How to Block and Report Cyberbullies –Social networking sites, email providers and other Internet-based communication portals almost always have “Block and Report” options, which can help to prevent some harassing messages from reaching a bullied kid. Make sure that your child knows how to block social networking profiles, email addresses and phone numbers from contacting him.
  8. Get Him Involved in an Activity or Hobby – Helping your child find a hobby that he’s interested in and getting him involved in activities outside of school can not only help to distract him from the taunts of his classmates, but also can boost his confidence when he discovers that he’s skilled in a particular area.
  9. Nurture His Self-Esteem – Your child’s self-esteem takes a battering when he’s taunted by bullies, making it imperative that you do everything you can to help him rebuild it. Make an effort to let him know that he’s an important, treasured part of the family, and that he’s loved very much and cannot be replaced.
  10. Consider Counseling – In particularly severe or long-term cases of bullying, your child may require the services of a counselor to work out his feelings and begin to recover. Remember that years of being bullied are the equivalent of being abused for that period of time, and may require some assistance for your child to overcome.

To put bullying into perspective, imagine that the children committing these acts against their peers were adults. Physically harming someone or intimidating them in order to take their money is robbery and assault. Slander, libel, harassment, assault and even sexual assault are all crimes that adults are charged with, but are often considered little more than a childhood rite of passage when they’re committed by other kids. Bullying is no laughing matter, though, and should never be taken lightly.

General Safety Issues

GETTING YOUR CHILD READY TO RIDE THE SCHOOL BUS (GUEST POST)

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 Sent to us by Molly Cunningham.

Since school has already started you may have already experienced this transition; however, it’s never too late to be aware of safety for your child who may be riding a school bus for the first time. pb

When the time comes for your little one to begin attending school, it can be heart-wrenching to watch his tiny little form clamber up the steps of the massive school bus, knowing that he’s growing up no matter how much you may not want him to. Even though you can’t stop him from getting older, you can help him prepare for this transitional age in his life, starting with what to expect when riding the school bus. There are a wide variety of things that your little scholar should know before he takes his first school bus ride, but these five are among the most important.

  1. How to Follow the Rules – Though some rules can seem unnecessarily strict to young children, your child should understand that those rules are in place to protect him and ensure his safety, as well as the safety of others. Shouting, standing up, roughhousing, or otherwise misbehaving can cause him to be subjected to disciplinary action up to and including suspension of bus privileges. Your child’s school will inform you about the rules governing bus behavior and will usually include a dedicated section in the school handbook. Taking the time to go over these rules and ensuring that your child understands what is and is not allowed when riding the bus can help him avoid any disciplinary problems and ensure a safe riding experience.
  2. What to Do if the Bus Is Late – While the system governing school transportation is usually an efficient and effective one, it’s important for parents and kids to understand that the system is run by human beings, who are not infallible. Buses can be late, delayed by inclement weather or other situations out of the drivers’ control. A late bus can cause children who are eagerly waiting to return home from school to panic. To prepare your children for this situation, be sure that they know what they should do and who they should contact to notify them of the situation.  Instill in them the notion that the most important thing to do is follow the instructions of their teachers and school administrators until the bus arrives. Almost all schools will have a contingency plan in place for just such an event, but your child needs to know that he will be taken care of and that the event, while new and scary to him, is one that the school staff is trained to handle.
  3. Pay Attention At All Stops – Very few experiences that your child has on the bus are as disconcerting as realizing that their stop has been passed and that they’re now in unfamiliar territory. While many drivers will keep in mind that a very young, inexperienced rider could be distracted by socializing and the novelty of riding a school bus, most will only wait so long to see if a child is present for their stop before heading to the next. Sleeping children are particularly difficult for a driver to see, so your child should be taught the importance of paying attention, staying awake, and getting off at the right stop.

4.        General School Bus Safety – Kids should know general bus safety guidelines before their first bus trip to ensure that they don’t inadvertently engage in unsafe behavior. It’s important to teach your child that he should always step away from the curb as the bus is approaching, and should only walk towards it after the bus has come to a complete stop. He should also know that he should never stoop to pick up objects that have fallen under the bus, and that he should only cross the street in front of the bus and at a distance of at least ten feet to ensure that the driver can see him. The small stature and quick movements of younger children make it difficult for drivers to spot them, and also makes it harder for a child to spot oncoming vehicles and other obstacles.

5.  The Dangers of Bullying – Bullying is a very serious problem, and it’s one that often occurs in the raucous environment of the school bus. Because bus drivers can have difficulty hearing everything that’s being said to an individual child over the collective din of many little voices, you simply cannot rely on the bus driver’s ability to detect and prevent bullying. Your child should understand the dangers of being a bully themselves, and know what to do if they’re the victim of bullying from other children on the bus. Assuring him that he can always tell an adult about any problems that he’s having or difficulties he’s forced to endure on the school bus is very important, because he may feel as if he has nowhere to turn if he becomes a target of school bus bullies.  The school principal should be notified, as well.

To get children prepared for their first trip on the school bus, role play various scenarios and talk about what to expect from the trip. Be sure to include everything from boarding the bus, to paying attention at each stop, to exiting the bus safely, and everything that could happen in between.  This is a very big step for your child.

Our thanks to Molly Cunningham, of Liveinnanny.com  for these excellent words of advice.  pb

General Safety Issues

ONE MEANING OF THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL – SLOW DOWN!

Many things go through our minds when school starts – for parents and children, it’s the beginning of a whole new school year – and it carries different meanings for everyone.  For the kids, it’s a brand new start – a chance to do better, strive to make better grades, and have fun!  For parents, it’s a rushed time to  prepare their lunches, or be sure they have lunch money, get them all to school on time,  and ensure that they arrive safely.    Parents should set the alarm a little earlier than usual, allowing for interruptions that might cause their child to be late to school, resulting in tardiness at work for them, as well.  For the rest of us, whose children are grown-ups, it’s a time for us to slow down – literally! 

Too many accidents happen because someone is in a big hurry.  We’re used to driving down the street that the school building is on at a speed that’s a little faster than the limit during school hours.  In many states, cell phones are banned in school zones, so put that cell phone away until you are safely away from the school zone.  Remember to watch for little ones.  This applies to parents, teens, and all other motorists.  One mistake caused by careless or hurried driving could change many lives, so slow down.  Regardless of how children are going to get to school, they must understand safety precautions.  Before school starts, if your child is going to walk to school, take a few practice walks with him/her.  Be sure they know to stop and look both ways, and never  dart out in front of a car.  If they want to ride their bikes, be sure they wear their helmets, and that they understand the rules of the road.  If a school bus is to be their mode of transportation, go to the bus stop with them the first few times to be sure they know how to get on and off the bus, and that they always stand six feet away from the curb.  Motorists must stop for school buses that have stopped to load or unload passengers. 

According to the National Safety Council, in 2009, over 230,000 children visited hospital emergency rooms because of playground injuries – many could have been prevented.  Children should use playgrounds with a soft surface.  Playgrounds with concrete, grass and dirt surfaces are too hard.  Monkey bars are unsafe and should not be used by children of any age.  Those under the age of four should not use climbing equipment. 

Last, but certainly not least,  an age-old problem in schools is bullying.  It’s sad but true  that there is some child that is going to pick on another child and make their day miserable.  Parents are responsible to teach their children that this is not acceptable; if theirs is the bully, and they are aware of it, they must put a stop to it.  If your child is the victim, encourage him/her to stay with a group of friends who will stand up for him.  All children should be taught to treat everyone the way they want to be treated, and this rule can be learned at a very young age.

Teachers should not tolerate bullying behavior and inform parents about what is going on so they can correct it.  Times are different than back in the “good old days”, when there was a certain amount of picking on or teasing someone, but it seems that it has reached a new level, and become even life-threatening in older teens on some occasions, such as online cyber-bullying.    

Hopefully this will be a happy and safe 2012 – 2013 school year for all.  Parents, cherish these times because they go by all too fast!  Support your kids in their extracurricular activities and studies, and take the time to ask them about how their school life is going.  They need to know you are interested.  Again, have a good school year, and keep our kids safe by driving slowly in school zones and paying close attention to their safety.